You need to kick this habit to the curb.
Parents find themselves saying sorry a lot. Sometimes it’s to cancel plans with a friend because your toddler came down with a bad stomach bug. Or maybe you’re apologizing profusely for forgetting to answer a text because you opened it right before the tantrum of all tantrums ensued.
No matter what, there’s always an overwhelming feeling of guilt nabbing at your conscious, and it makes you constantly feel like you’re never good enough.
Well, not anymore. The mom behind the blog Grown Up Glamour by Anneliese Lawton shared some #RealTalk recently, and we could not agree more.
“Can I be honest for a second? I really don’t want to be apologizing anymore when life comes calling.”
That’s an idea we can get behind. Sure, apologizing when a situation warrants it is only right, but you don’t have to say sorry every time your parenting duties call. Because—spoiler alert—impromptu meltdowns, sicknesses, play dates and practices pop up all the time. It’s not like you don’t want to be with your friends, but your kids need you just a little bit more.
“There’s a difference between apologizing when you’ve hurt someone’s feelings and apologizing as a method of being polite…we’re raising a family, we’re not doing anything wrong,” Lawton says.
As the mom explains, family comes first.
“Sometimes, even when I’ve done all I can to have that drink, see that movie [or] visit that friend, family comes calling and has to come first. Sometimes, we don’t have a choice despite our best efforts to make those outside our family unit a priority,” Lawton admits.
She understands saying sorry seems like the right thing to do, but it’s not always the most appropriate choice of words.
“There’s got to be a better way to let our friends know we love them, we miss them and we want them…but sometimes we need to say no,” she shares. “That shouldn’t require an apology.”
The mom has a new answer ready for when she finds herself tempted to throw out that two-worded response. Instead, she’ll say “thank you for understanding. For being supportive. Thank you for having my back.”
There’s a lot of truth in Lawton’s words. Ask any mom and she’ll tell you all about how friendship changes once you and your friends become mothers. Although your phone conversations may become shorter and your get-togethers less frequent, you’ll quickly learn your mom friends are the best friends you could ask for.
